Do you make the mistake of staying on the phone with a girl for hours on end? And what worse is that you have just met her maybe not even a day a go at the bar.
«Wow, wow, wow Scott isn’t that a good thing, we are connecting with each other…»
Not necessary! It is great to build connection with girls but here is the problem with talking on the phone for way to long, too soon. What you’re essentially doing is communicating to her that you have NO LIFE, and you can waste hours upon hours just chatting with her.
«But, Scott we really enjoy talking to each other, and she seems to really enjoy talking to me too!»
You are probably right. Sure the both of you really enjoy talking to her and finding out more about her. And this hopefully it is also respicoal that she really enjoys talking to you as well. And it is perfectly normal after all she is attracted to you and you to her as well.
However that being said, this can also cause more damage towards the relationship then it will actually help. When you talk to a girl for way too long on the phone as soon as you met her it causes 3 things to happen that you really don’t want.
Allow me to explain myself…
First one I already explain, that is consciously or even unconsciously she will feel that you have no life and nothing better to do.
The second is that it removes all the mystery out of you. If you’re always talking to her on the phone, then it gives her no room to miss and think about what you’re up to which women loves to do.
The third problem that can happen is that you both get too comfortable with each other talking on the PHONE, and it makes it harder for her to actually see you in person. When I first dated my girlfriend she had to leave the city for 2 weeks, so we had no choice but to keep connected by phone and by the time she came back she told me this «wow, I don’t know why but I was nervous to see you in person again».
Anyway the bottom line is girls like a man who is a little bit mysteries, and can make her feel excitement. She don’t want you to ruin all the fun because of long hour phone conversations, and of course she is not going to tell you this because she doesn’t even know it herself, remember it’s all in her subconscious.
So it is to your best interest to be a little mysterious and not reveal all your cards at once. You want her to think that you live an exciting life and she wants to be part of it. And if you are wondering how long the phone call should be. Honestly, I don’t have an exact time limit as to how long you should talk to a her on phone but here is what I do personally.
I don’t talk to a girl on the phone for more than 5 minutes unless we have been seeing each other for a while. I use the phone as a way to bridge between meeting, and maybe some times I would flirt with them just a little bit to keep the attraction going. I get them on the date and that’s where I would focus on connection and learn more about her.
So what if you’re not really that busy right now during your life, do you lie about being a busy man?
You could but I don’t promote lying to women, and I never do. So I suggest you make yourself by picking up a hobby, go to the gym, spent time with your FRIENDS, work on your career, or whatever. I’m sure you can find something meaning that you really wanted to do but never got the time before everybody does.